Of course as your mother, I have to advise you that if you don't have something nice to say, then you shouldn't say anything at all. More than one time I've stuck my own foot in my mouth by relaying information that wasn't mine to relay, or saying things that shouldn't be said.
But gossip doesn't always have to be hurtful.... sometimes it is just learning who likes who, or what is happening behind the scenes at your workplace, or enjoying a collage of celebrity photos (that you wish you weren't interested in, but you can't help but stare at). Sometimes it is a way to bond with your colleagues, friends, neighbors and even strangers in the grocery store (when you are both in line, and both flipping through the pages of the latest Hollywood breakup scandal). Sometimes learning something shallow about someone else's life is a sweet escape from the demands of your own. Just try to stop short of being hurtful or mean-spirited...
And if you have a few hours to really waste on guilty pleasures, here's some advice from your (somewhat embarassed to admit I do this) Mom -- Throw on your bathing suit, pull your hair on top of your head, find the biggest pair of sunglasses you own, pour a glass of raspberry lemonade, aim your lawn chair toward the sun, and have a stack of fashion, gossip and entertainment magazines at your side. Pass the afternoon looking at glossy photos, reading haphazard writing, and forgetting about your own responsibilities for awhile.
When it's time to face the real world again, you will be surprised at how relaxed this silly activity has made you. The "scandals" of your own life will seem small, and your sense of purpose will be renewed.
Just do me a favor... if you should ever find yourself the object of the paparazzi glare, wear clean underwear and shave your armpits to avoid being caught on the dreaded "What were they thinking?" page.
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